Thursday, August 19, 2010

How do I deal with my gay crush?

So basically I am super 'crushed' with my crush, and not so tired, so I'm posting a question. I've spent time discussing my crush with two very intelligent friends of mine and they've presented two solutions: one is just to tell him, because he would like to know, and the other is that I shouldn't tell him, because it might shove him more in the closet and now isn't a good time. I just want some more advice. So, I have a crush. A boy whose sexuality is definitely in question. He'll deny it, his family believes homosexuality is a sin, but he hasn't had a girlfriend in a while, and will claim he just hasn't liked anyone recently. He also treats me differently, he's distinctly rude to me. But it almost seems flirtatious. But now, I don't know what to do. My second friend, citing his problems at home, one of his family members is seriously ill, says now is not a good time to tell him. She thinks it would be too much for him to deal with, making him repress his sexuality further.How do I deal with my gay crush?
I best advice I can give you is to read REICHEN LEMKHUL'S


';HERE'S WHAT WE'LL SAY';- it's about his life growing up and hiding his sexuality and finally coming out and learning certain things with relationships and people the hard way-very good book. It'll inspire you and you'll better understand yourself; and your crush-trust me, he is very detailed in his emotions; the changes; his partners and their feelings and of course the sex.How do I deal with my gay crush?
There isn't much you can do if he can't be honest with himself. I was once in a situation where I was the one who couldn't except myself and everytime I hooked up I ended it quickly b/c I didn't want anyone to know. Now that I've come to terms with myself I would never do that to anybody. But be careful, people who aren't sure are that ones that can hurt you the most!
Best to go out with a person who is a gay than straight. Cuz that person would understand you more. Yet, let me tell you what, many many people go through gay/lesbian crush. It just some are more sensitive and some aren't. It just might be a one time thing, you know. Yet,,,,,,yeah, tell him, if you think he can accept it.
Take a (no pun intended) back door approach.


Ask him how he feels about gays and homosexuality and if he had a brother that was gay how would he feel? Has he ever had a friend that was gay? or if a guy were to 'hit' on him how would he react?


Remember that sometimes our fantasies are better than the real thing.
i think you should get a chuhuahua and name him bean bucket
if he never said he is gay regardless of the reasons, then just let him be. he may not like it if you assume this even if he is. if he is rude to you, how can that be flirting? i don't mean to sound critical but he must be going through alot with the family illness. just wait it out. i agree with the second friend. after some time has passed, it will be safer. trust me, don't push him too hard or you may jeopardize the friendship. respect him and give him his space. he may be gay but it should be his choice to tell you or anyone else. i am sure you know him better so maybe he is just going through alot and is not ready to talk about it, if he really is gay.

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