How should I deal with this?

I really like a girl and I don't know how she feels about me. I'm a little afraid of creeping her out with how I feel. We have known each other since Kindergarten, been friends for as long as I can remember, and been best friends for a year or two. She is 16, I am 18. I feel so happy around her and I am a much better person around her. I worry she may see me at my less good moments or that she is not interested. Basically anything that makes me think I wouldn't be with her forever worries me. I work hard in life in order to be financially secure so that she wouldn't be afraid to marry. I try to drop incredibly subtle hints, but they are too subtle for my own good I think. But I'm afraid to be less subtle. Our families are also good friends, and our moms are best friends. My friends already act like she's my girlfriend, and that seems to bug her. We talk about deep things and my conversations with her usually last at least an hour, often going to two. We talk about life and our experiences. We have talked about relationships before and we both mentioned that it would be weird if WE were to date. (we didn't come with the topic out of nowhere, just from discussing the rumors about us (apparently her little brother has also declared me her boyfriend.))





My main worries are:





1. I am worried she may not like me the way I do. I dread not being with her forever.





2. I sometimes worry I am fooling myself, and that I have no real devotion, and that it's something I wish I were capable of. It seems too perfect somehow. Like the feelings are too good to be true and I'm not a good enough person to be so devoted. I am a fairly natural actor and I have sometimes had trouble with fooling myself, though nothing of such importance before.





3. I worry I may never be good enough to be a married man. That I will fail financially and be unable to support a family, or that I will fail morally/socially and not be a suitable husband.





So basically, I guess I am dealing with a crush. I have never dated and I never plan to until I can support a marriage (or would be able to fairly soon or when I need to). I believe the purpose of dating is looking for a wife and should only be done with the intent of marriage. I think dating 'to get to know each other' is garbage honestly and so basically, I see dating as something very serious and of great importance and value, not to be done lightly.





I appreciate all advice. If you see this topic 3 years after it was started I still appreciate the replies, even if it's just a handful of words. All and any advice/guidance/comfort is appreciated and will be made note of.How should I deal with this?
Just tell her what you feel and see what's her reaction about this.


The main point is as long as you are willing to try your best to settle the financial for your future and you will take care of her and treat her like she should treaten. Anything could be possible, dont' be afraid of fail. It's a good thing to let people know aht we feel specially the one we love. Good luck....How should I deal with this?
Ok


Seems like you REALLY like her


Ok don't be scared to tell her..


When I like a guy I tell him


You should just get it off your chest


But be like ';I want to tell you something but I don't want you to feel weird or this to affect our friendship'; it usually helps =)